Losing someone to a long term chronic illness can stretch families to the edge; you watch the gradual loss of capacity and at the same time take on increased responsibilities. It’s easier when the ill person handles their losses with grace and even humor; harder when they become angry and fight, frightened at the prospect of a life foreshortened. Family – the ones closest - are the recipient of that anger; after all, who else would stand for it. “Well", caregivers say, “a